01 September 2010

Homesick? ? ?

"If you’re at home, you will feel a deep love for where you are. You’ll appreciate it more than ever before. You will feel happiness.
If you’re not at home - like me at the moment -, you will feel homesick, lonely and eager to return home. Because it’s somewhere you feel safe."- unknown

Where do I begin. So needless to say, (if you read a previous post or 2 of mine) that this work week started off rough. Not only for myself, but also for Mister Wonderful. I have always had the mentality that Work is just fact what it is.... W O R K ! If it was "fun" they'd call it something else!

Mister Wonderful has had a hard time adjusting to his new place of work. I guess you could say something is missing in his new work environment. The people, their attitudes, the friendships. I really can't say because I don't work at the same place mister wonderful does. He's a nurse at the largest hospital here in AZ. When I say large, it feels very small to him, coming from the Cleveland Clinic!

We have had different schedules this week, so I'm already in bed asleep for 2 hours before Mister Wonderful even gets home. (a teacher's schedule never changes, only a nurse and their shifts!)
So I called Mister Wonderful on my lunch break today, just to say hey and that I had paid the rent. He was at the gym (no surprise there!) and was kinda short on the phone. Hmmmm...
I got a text a few seconds later of him apologizing, and just a little paragraph of him stating that he was homesick and frustrated with his job.

I honestly didn't know how to respond. In most relationships, I'd say I mostly see/hear of girls being the ones that are all tight with their families/mothers/fathers/bros/sisters...etc etc....

Mister Wonderful and I couldn't be more opposite when it comes to our relationships with our families! He's SOOOOO close with his family, where as I am..well.....a big fat NOT. My dad and I maybe talk once every wk to 2 wks. Mister Wonderful talks to his dad EVERYDAY.

Maybe I have blinders on and can't see why it's so hard for him because I am just not in the same boat when it comes to family relationships and the closeness. But I do know I feel bad. Really bad. Guilty bad like I did something wrong in wanting him to move here to be with me. He assured me "Not to worry" that he was just "telling me how he feels" but does that lead up to something? As in will he leave me high and dry and want to move back home? Is it too hard for him to be here so far from his family? If he moves back, he loses me. I can't work in the state of Ohio. My teaching credentials aren't good there. I know he wouldn't leave me high and dry. This of course was my parents BIGGEST problem/concern when they found out that only my name was on the lease...my dad kept going on and on what if he leaves then your in trouble etc etc....

Mister Wonderful assures me he isn't going anywhere...but STILL...

How am I to respond when he tells me he's homesick? I can't be the dad/mom in his life..I can only be the girlfriend. I try to fulfill as much as I can, but is it enough?

Mister Wonderful has been in AZ with me now for 2 full months. His dad is coming to visit in Nov...and his mom isn't coming till Feb. We are planning on going "home" (his home) for Xmas...but what is a girl to think/do in the mean time? I'm happy he is being open and communicating with me about how he FEELS, but yet I don't know what the right thing to say/do to these feelings/emotions of his.

Has anyone else gone through this?



  1. I haven't been through this, but in my opinion, he knew the risk he was taking when he moved to be with you and he wouldn't have done that if he wasn't sure. Maybe just listen to him when he feels homesick and try to make it better by asking his mom the recipe to and fixing his favorite meal or making a skype session with his parents... the thought would probably mean a lot. Good luck!

  2. Thanks Lisa for writing..I feel like whenever I post "serious" things no one ever comments! :( We skyped all the time till we moved to the same state I don't know why he doesn't do that with his mom and siblings...Thanks for suggesting!

  3. I was him when I lived with my bf in Florida and he never learned how to concole me or make me feel ok about it so I'm not sure I can help. I just know that it would have been nice for him to try and see it from my side and it sounds like thats what youre doing! Other than that it was really something I had to deal with on my own and talking to my parents everyday always helped! And suggesting he skype with them is a great idea. My current bf does that with his family all the time !


If you visited and read my post, be kind, leave a line!

Blogger template designed By The Sunday Studio.