26 February 2014

The Everyone is pregnant post, and you're not

I must have had this saved in my draft box at least 2 months now, wanting to talk about it, but then again asking my self why bother? Blogging has really really become almost a thing of the past. Most bloggers hardly blog anymore, and those who read it DONT take any time to comment. Seriously. Check out comments from years ago on my older posts, to now. And it's not just my blog. Some other high traffic blogs are experiencing the same decline. 



Anyhow, where were we? Oh yeah, the post where I talk about how Mister Wonderful and I have been at this trying to make a baby business for a year now, and NOTHING has happened. 



I think we started off like most couples do, you quit the birth control and fall into the "lets just see what happens" category. That was a year ago this February. 

Around July of 2013, we began buying ovulation kits to know when I was and wasn't ovulating. Who knew that you seriously have like a 48 hour window to get pregnant. Seriously that's it folks! All about that timing of that egg being released I suppose! 

In December of 2013 I was given Clomid, in hopes to make me ovulate sooner in my cycle. I for some reason would ovulate then seriously 4 days later get my period. For any of you newbies out there, this means I had to short of a window to get pregnant. Not enough time for the whole attaching to the uterus lining thing. 

Here we are now in Feb 2014, and nothing still has happened. I've been told by my doc that I'm healthy--the right weight, I'm active I don't smoke, don't drink get lots of sleep. I ovulate so what's the deal? I'm suppose to complete one more round of Clomid before they want to do a dye test on my tubes to see if there is any blockage. 

Has anyone else gone through all these hoops? Any success or failures? 

Hubs is 33 I'm 31 and hence why so much "effort" has gone into trying in the past year. We aren't old at all to have a kid, but once 38 hits, it's much harder to have a healthy baby. 


32 comments:

  1. Check out Christin from The Southern Wife. She just posted today about her infertility for over 2 years, not to discourage you, but she mentioned to email her to find support!! http://www.thesouthernwife.com/

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  2. I've been there! We tried for a year and nothing happened. Turned out I have PCOS and had never had a period on my own (I had been on the pill since I was 17). Had to take a pill to force a period (because my body was just building the uterine lining more and more each month) then the clomid to try to ovulate. Luckily the first round worked and we ended up pregnant. It's so frustrating, and even more so when everyone around you is suddenly pregnant. Worse is when your best friend accidentally gets pregnant and is annoyed by it! Are you tracking your basal body temp? That helped me to know exactly when I was ovulating. Good luck!

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  3. Kelly's Korner Blog just did a link up for infertility, I'm sure there are lots of bloggers linked up that have similar stories. Many of them have babies, too! Hope things work out for you! :)

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  4. I'm sorry you are going through this! I suffered with infertility for 4 years, if you ever need to talk, I'm here for you!! I hope you can get to the bottom of this quickly. The wait is the hardest, but stay strong!!!

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  5. We went off birth control this month and I'm praying I don't have to cross the infertility road. Best of luck and many prayers will be sent your way as you try to figure this out. Gratefully we have wonderful doctors these days to help!

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  6. Been through TONS. 8 rounds of climid, 7 IUIs and 5 IVFs personally. I am an OBGYN Nurse Practitioner who specializes in infertility so I know a whole lot more than a little about it. Feel free to email me and we can chat. Are you on progesterone? You should be if you aren't having at least 12 days from ovulation to the first day of your period.

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  7. I have no advice but I just wanted to leave a comment wishing you my best and I pray it happens for you soon.

    As a side note to the first part of your post---I agree. I love blogging and the blogging community but there's just way less time these days to devote to it. I used to think I could do it all…but I know that's just not true without sacrificing more important things.

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  8. I knew people who are going through the same thing. I'll be thinking about you!

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  9. I've never been married and I've never tried to get pregnant, but I have plenty of friends that have. some it took years and some it took months. the best thing is to not get discouraged and to surround yourself with the most supportive friends you have that will keep your spirits high. you're not alone in this fight. I had a college friend who thought she couldn't have children. they adopted a sweet little newborn...and then almost a year later she got pregnant, never thinking it could happen. I wish I could offer more encouragement, but i'm thinking about you. everything as a time and as frustrating as it may be to hear it...God has a plan and everything is perfect in his timing.

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  10. totally relate! we are going on just about a year now too! did the ok lets see what happens, now finally tracking ovulation more carefully! its so hard when you see everyone around you getting pregnant and you arent!

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  11. My husband and I have been there for over a year as well. I had every blood test, the dye test and then 5 rounds of clomid. I am turning 32 next month, so would love to be pregnant anytime. I am going to see an Endocrinologist today that deals with PCOS, since that is my problem. We will be praying for you and your husband! Hang in there, it's a journey but the end result will be worth it!!

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  12. I haven't been there but I could imagine how hard that is. We are in the early stages of trying and i'm praying for the best!
    I hope they can figure out whats going on with you guys and a sweet little baby will come into your lives shortly! Best of luck!

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  13. My hubs and I tried for a full year with no success. Surprisingly enough got pregnant shortly after that year and ended up losing our first from miscarriage. 4 months later I was pregnant again and we now have a healthy baby (almost 2) girl. Im telling you this because unfortunately more times than not (except for these annoying teens who have sex irresponsibly and can get pregnant at the drop of a freaking hat) every woman has some similar struggle with conceiving. You're not alone, sweet girl! Your time will come. And when It does you'll finally understand why the good Lord waited! He's still crafting your perfect angel baby!!! Keep your head high (and your legs elevated..lol) and I'll be praying for you pretty girl!

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  14. i went through the exact same thing. has your husband been checked out too? we eventually discovered that it's both of us. i don't really ovulate bc of my irregular periods and he doesn't really have enough sperm...excellent news, huh?? yeah, so i've just come to the conclusion that i'll be a dog mom forever while i sit and struggle with constant abnormal bleeding.
    maybe suggest getting him checked as well.
    also, another thing i just had to make myself believe was that if my body was not getting pregnant on its own, maybe that's how it was supposed to be and if the pills weren't working, then there was a reason. everything happens for a reason, so maybe your timing just isn't right and it will happen down the road for you. i don't know. but i hope you find comfort soon because i know how frustrating it is!

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  15. my hubby and i have been trying to make a tiny human for about 2.5 yrs now... there is a great network of infertility bloggers out there that give so much support. I encourage you to check them out. they are also super knowledgable about everything... i would first suggest you go to a reproductive endocrinologist if you're not already... the one we saw ordered the tube test before we even wasted our time with the clomid. I did 9 IUI's, 1 IVF and am currently on my second FET (frozen embryo transfer).
    I just had a laparoscopy and after over 2 long years was finally given the diagnosis of Stage 3 endometriosis.... something i had ZERO symptoms of... and for the past 2 years have checked out totally normal.
    it's such a frustrating process, so hang in there! feel free to email me if you have any questions! and here's my blog link: http://theifjourney.blogspot.com/

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  16. Ovulation was always weird for me. I used an app like it was the Bible and as it turned out, I ovulated just one week after my period started. My cycles were always normal 28-29 day cycles, so I should have been ovulating around day 14, but it was day 7 instead. I know that that probably doesn't mean much to you or apply in your situation, but it definitely taught me that "science" isn't always so accurate.

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  17. You wrote my story...

    We started trying in December of 2012. Bought our first home (condo) in April of 2013, with a second bedroom just waiting to be used. Well, that bedroom is like a junk room now. Not the nursery I had "planned." I had a chemical pregnancy in September but that's been it... I've been temping/charting and using OPKs since our second cycle trying. So I know all too well what you're going through. My husband and I just started to go through all the testing to see what's wrong, if anything... If you want to talk more, email me. I'd love a friend who can (sadly) relate... lindsayinnyc3 at gmail dot com ((hugs))

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  18. Gah! My comments been eaten twice... Good thing I like you :)

    You basically just wrote my story. We've been trying to get pregnant since December of 2012 with only a chemical pregnancy to show for it. We bought our first house (condo) in April of 2013, with that second bedroom for a nursery. It's basically a junk room now... So much for that nursery I had planned... We just started going through all the testing to try and figure out what's wrong, if anything. If you want a friend who can relate to what you're going through, please email me - lindsayinnyc3 at gmail dot com ((hugs))

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  19. God bless you and your H! I know how difficult this must be... my H and I are in the let's "see what happens phase" and I feel like I can't do enough. I'm not sure what help I could be... but T&P!

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  20. My husband and I tried for 18 months before we got pregnant. We tried for 10 months on our own before consulting a fertility specialist. I went through 4 unsuccessful IUIs and 1 IVF before becoming pregnant. I wrote all about my journey on my blog - http://jaredandjackiroche.blogspot.com/search/label/Fertility
    If you want to talk, vent, or ask any questions about this process, feel free to email me anytime at jackiadamsroche@gmail.com I'll be praying for you and your husband.

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  21. I am so glad that I found your blog. My husband and I have also been trying to have a baby for while with no luck. I started Clomid in December and while I am finally ovulating still no positive pregnancy test. I am so bummed and frustrated by the whole thing so to hear your story makes me feel like I am not alone. If you would like to chat in more detail feel free to email me! Hoping this round of Clomid works for you!!

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  22. Read the book Taking Charge of Your Fertility by Toni Weschler. It will explain to you exactly how your body works, and your natural windows of fertility/infertility and how to make the most of that window. It's not a magic fix or guarantee that you will get pregnant, but it will provide you with the tools to understand your body and work with it as much as possible.

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  23. I am so very sorry sweet girl...
    I could not imagine what you two are having to go through!

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  24. Cassie-

    I know exactly how you feel. Tony and I have tried for four years now with no success, and I did Clomid for two years. Last Tuesday I had a doc appt. and I was told I was being sent on to an infertility specialist, and no more clomid. It pretty much broke my heart, and I spent the evening in tears. People tell stories of how they got pregnant, and say to stay positive, and it's really hard. I appreciate their thoughts, but I also struggle with not feeling bitter, because the last thing I want to hear are success stories, because I'm not having my own success story (does that make sense? not trying to demean people being empathetic and helpful, it's just hard). I was diagnosed with PCOS two years ago, with cysts all over my ovaries. After a complete diet and exercise change the cysts are gone, so I assumed I would get pregnant, and no. Have you had an ultrasound? Again- if you want to talk, feel free to pm me on facebook, and I'm seeing a specialist next Tuesday, so I can let you know what they suggested for next steps! Hang in there- I know it stinks. :(

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  25. I agree we all have stopped blogging and commenting as much as we used too.. I'm sorry to hear that this hasn't been successful as hoped.. I hope it will happen soon for you! Sometimes it just takes longer but I do have some friends who eventually had to go through with the dye tests etc.. Best of luck lady!

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  26. I've not technically walked the walk of infertility, but I was told we'd have a 2% chance of having biological children...That said, if you're not seeing any success with Clomid, I'd suggest progesterone as well. But bigger than all the medical/technicalities of conceiving and pregnancy, I must say God's timing with this sort of thing is mind blowing when you step back and look at the big picture. At least, that's how it is for me three years after welcoming our surprise baby. I pray y'all find some answers and get that positive pregnancy you're wanting! Trust in Him.

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  27. C Mae,
    While I do not struggle with infertility, I do struggle with not having a child. (I realize that must sound like a complete contradiction) Let me explain...I am nearly 26 years old and have had only one "serious" romantic relationship in my life. And it only last four and half months. I have always loved children and, as a teenager, dreamed of becoming pregnant with my first child (or twins...I've always wanted twins) in my early twenties. Obviously, that isn't going to happen... As if to make matters worse, my ex-boyfriend who is now married, is expecting twins this summer. Sometimes I wonder how it is that he got to live our life together without me.

    I say all this to let you know, you're not alone. I may not be struggling with infertility...but I am struggling with being alone and childless. And in my mind, those issues seem linked.

    I will keep your situation in my prayers.

    Also, I am an avid reader of your blog and will do my part to show more comment love in the future :).

    I hope you have a great weekend!

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  28. My sister had some trouble getting pregnant and they put her on clomid and she had twins ;)

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  29. Oh this must be so hard for you both!
    I got pregnant the first time after 10 months of stopping with my birth control pill. But it turned out in a miscarriage. After that it took me another 13 months to get pregnant again (my mind was going round and round: what did I do wrong, were we ever going to have a child) - but out of the blue after 24 months I was pregnant. And now I'm pregnant with my 3rd child.
    I do know how it feels though - everybody getting pregnant (some even by accident) and not getting pregnant yourself.
    A colleague of mine had real problems to conceive too. The first child was born after many attempts of insemination - She wanted a second child and had to start IVF.
    BUT that didn't work and after a few months the miracle took place! She was pregnant - without any help of ovulation tests, IVF or other hormones!
    So keep on hoping! It will be all right! Best of luck to you both!

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  30. If you have less than 10-12 from when you ovulate to your period, your hormones progesterone most likely isn't enough. Have you had all your hormone levels taken? I'd even have thyroid levels taken too.

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