My day started off just fine until lunch rolled around. I don't even know if I want to get into the story because it just irritates me when I think about it. I'm so angry over it, that I even deactivated from FB for a while.
And yes, the story completely has to do with freakin facebook. I've never even had drama on FB before until now. The worst kind of drama. Boyfriend's family on FB drama. Boyfriends family writing on my wall non stop drama. Drama over a stupid news video! ARGH!!!! Facebook= just the internet!!!!!! It's not REAL LIFE!!!!! It's a computer with posts. People need to get over it!
I am perfectly aware that Mister Wonderful reads this, and who knows may comment on it, may not. But it's my blog, my words my thoughts ALL off of FB which means only blog followers will no whats up and NO ONE FROM FB will!
There was a video on Yahoo last night about a cop that gave a dad a ticket for speeding his in labor wife to the hospital.
http://cosmos.bcst.yahoo.com/up/player/popup/?cl=23741170
you may have to copy this into your browser to watch.
The cop escorted the man and his in labor wife to the hospital, but then went ahead and wrote the man a TICKET for SPEEDING to the hospital!!!!!! The kicker of the story was, the wife delivered the baby within S I X minutes of arriving to the hospital. If that doesn't scream emergency I don't know what does! So as a viewer of this video, of course I totally feel for this family who is trying to fight the ticket right? I mean come on!!!! The cop said that the man endangered the life of others driving that fast. Don't ambulances speed to get people to the hospital? Don't cops chase bad guys in their cop cars? Aren't these the same thing as what the man did?
So I posted the video on FB, to see what others thought. First mistake by me, I used a one sentence heading of the video to read as "This is why people hate cops!"
Enter drama.
Mister Wonderful's dad is a cop. His grandfather was a cop. Many of Mister Wonderful's family added me on FB. The only people who commented on the video were his family. They weren't to thrilled I used the word hate apparently.
No where in that one sentence did I say ANYTHING about his dad and hating his dad as a cop. No where did I say that I, ME, C MAE author of LIVE WHAT YOU LOVE, HATE COPS. I just generic-ly(<-------- like my made up word?)) threw in there that PEOPLE as in the American people as a whole hate em. Okay I get where I messed up with the word hate. But I didn't mean it like I HATE BLACK people or I HATE JEWS....I should of said aren't fond of or don't like. But I was trying to make a point that I thought the ticket was ridiculous.
His uncle, and sister posted back and for 16 comments long about how they thought it was wrong of me to post the video. WTF? His sister even asked me to take it down. Are you serious? Hold up.
It's MY FB!!!!!!!! It's AMERICA! THIS IS A FREE COUNTRY WITH FREEDOM of speech! I can write what I want, when I want! Where does she get off telling me to take the video off my own wall just because she doesn't like it?
GRRRRRRRR I was so pissed, that I deleted all the comments made. I left the video up.
Next day (which was today)
I get a text at lunch from Mister Wonderful asking me to take the video down.. My heart sinks. This isn't good. He wasn't even involved up until this point. I text back No. I will not. I will not because I didn't mention a family member. I will not because I am entitled to my opinion. I will not even if I used terrible wording. It's my sh*T. back off.
Enter first fight for us. I cried right before my first graders came to art after lunch. It was awful. I felt so unprofessional that I let my personal life effect my job. I couldn't stop thinking about what damage this was doing to the relationships I was suppose to be building with his family not burning the bridges between us all! :(
I have always been intimidated by the Police. They freak me out a lot. It's no secret that I was super scared to even meet Mister Wonderful's dad. I haven't had really good experiences with cops either. EVERY time I have ever been pulled over, cops have hassled me. Hassled me in the sense of I'm a girl, I'm blonde, blah blah. They ask the stupidest questions to make small talk, one cop demanded I look at him while he was speaking to me. (see I was so mad for being pulled over in my own neighborhood that I wouldn't look at the guy and he for some reason thought he could speak to me like I was a child in trouble? I DONT THINK SO!) I have never gotten a ticket thankfully even in my life, but I just feel really uncomfortable around cops. I didn't mean to step on anyone's toes, there are probably readers of mine that are married to a cop or have one in the family as well. I was just merely trying to say, it's incidences like the video I posted that give cops a bad rep, hence people like your average joe or myself tend to just not like them in general.
I feel really bad about everything, but I definitely felt hurt being attacked on FB by none other than 2 of his family members!!!!! How am I suppose to not feel weird around them when or if I ever see them again? I already know this is an "X" against me. greeeeeeeeat. I'm probably officially as awful as the last GFs Mister Wonderful has had. I mean I already took him away from Ohio, I just pretty much gave his fam another reason to hate me more. Sweet. I swear I dig myself into these holes. I am so that song by John Mayer
My stupid mouth
Has got me in trouble
I said too much again
To a date over dinner yesterday
And I could see
She was offended
She said "well anyway..."
Just dying for a subject change
Oh, another social casualty
Score one more for me
How could I forget?
Mama said "think before speaking"
No filter in my head
Oh, what's a boy to do
I guess he better find one soon
Yep this is me to a T.
Does anyone feel where I am coming from or am I a total wack job about this?
Facebook drama is terrible. And I think they're overreacting a little, because it's obvious you weren't talking about his family!! Love that John Mayer song! I have a stupid mouth a lot.. say stuff and then wish I could take it back when it's too late.
ReplyDeletep.s. that story totally happened to a friend of my parent's back in the day.. they own a furniture store and his wife had to be rushed to the hospital with complications.. so he had to fly to the hospital in the furniture store truck, got pulled over. and ARRESTED!! They thought he was making the story up about his wife being in the hospital and that he had stolen the truck! CRAZY! meanwhile, his wife almost died from her pregnancy complications and he FINALLY managed to get to the hospital.
Sorry that's a novel! Hope your day gets better! :)
awww honey! I feel your pain so deeply...I wish I could send a big hug right now! I absolutely understand where you're coming from. FB is a wonderful thing sometimes, but it really can create more drama than Mark Zuckerberg probably ever hoped or envisioned. Keep it down for a week or so {or longer!}, but just know you're always safe to vent to us. Hang in there! xoxo {av} P.S. Maybe winning my giveaway would help! It's a good one :)
ReplyDeleteIt's sounds like your post wasn't that big of a deal, and others dramatized it. From my own experiences with the "in-laws" family stuff(opinions) usually equals super defensive people. I've been there done that. Hang in there!!!
ReplyDeleteBack up. You were RIGHT at the beginning of this post...when you said it's your fb and you can do what you want! then at the end you started to feel guilty which I totally get but stick your ground...you are right! that's shitty of them and they are overreacting! I would NOT delete it either if Billy asked me to. and in fact similar situations have happened and I hold my ground. Way to go! (but yes, I do think you could have worded it differently instead of hate) xoxo
ReplyDeleteP.S. That JM song is totally perfect for this moment....and I'm with you, the 50 have always intimidated me. BIG TIME. Hang in there! xoxo
ReplyDeleteI'm going to have to agree with you on this one - I hate cops too. I know exactly what you meant when you said you posted that with the video because I thought the SAME THING when we were talking about this story at work today. I get that the man was speeding and putting people in danger but come on! You are completely entitled to your own opinion and I don't see anything wrong with what you said. You were speaking in general terms, not about his specific family members.
ReplyDeleteI think it is awful they attacked you this way and wanted you to take the video down. It is your FB account and you can put up whatever you like. They should have messaged you instead of commenting for all the world to see. I am sorry you are upset. I know it is hard when your BF's family comes down on you. There opinion means something to you and you don't want to be looked differently now. I am sure it will all blow over soon:)
ReplyDeleteI saw the story too. I would like to say that I am for both parties. I know in this society that this is a shock, you are either one way or the other. But my husband was a cop before he joined the military. We have a lot of cop friends. But in no way did I feel like you offened the "whole" police force when saying that. I believe that the father WAS putting himself, his wife, soon to be born baby, and other motorists at risk when he was driving 102 mph. That to me in my book is a ticket waiting to happen. Did he have a good reason...of course he did. Any one of us would do it in a heartbeat if we were put into that situation. Should the cop given him a ticket? Yes and No. He may have pulled him to the side and gave him a little pep talk about understanding the reasoning behind his driving, but he could have easily killed everyone in the car...don't do that again type of deal. But than on the other hand giving him a ticket might be the one factor that makes him not do it again, life lesson kinda thing. You just never know in this situation. And it is, in fact your opinion when posting things like this on your OWN facebook.
ReplyDeleteI personally wouldn't have put "this is why people hate cops" if you have someone in your family who is in fact a cop...better wording could have been used no doubt in my mind. BUT this is also my own opinion. I also believe that your in-laws and other famiily should have been more clean cut and nice about not wanting to see that stuff seeing how it seemed offensive to them.
I wouldn't sweat the small stuff and patching up the ties with the in-laws are easier than you think. Just talk to them personally and say that this wasn't meant to be directed towards you and blah, blah, blah and whatever else pops up in your heart.
oh yeah and you're not crazy :)
{sorry for the long post}
I have delt with the same situation as I use to date someone that was of hispanic decent. I got pissed because I moved all the way to Florida for him to a town full of hispanics and I couldn't get a job because I wasn't biligual. So my post of fb was, I live in America why can't I find a job where I don't have to speak Spanish. I got heck for it, needless to say I told them to stuff it and ended it with the guy.
ReplyDeleteYou didn't direct it toward them neither did I. It's sad what this dam world has come to and people's over reactions.
Cheer up! It's been a crappy two days for me as well. Stick to what you feel, don't back down because of them! HUGS***
To make you feel better... my favorite "Why we hate cops" story. Ryan Moats and I graduated high school together.
ReplyDeletehttp://sports.espn.go.com/nfl/news/story?id=4017382
This will blow over- try no to think about it. In-laws are hard to please anyway.
Seriously, facebook causes so much drama...but its like we can't give up on it...we learned our lesson...but we never do. I totally see your point, and I personally, this you have every right to be upset/disappointed. I mean, if I was the family member, I would have never taken it personally. Many people actually HATE cops...and they have to know deep down you aren't one of them. Its ridiculous how much trouble facebook can cause. And who takes things seriously on facebook, sigh. I hope things get better tomorrow lovely!!!
ReplyDeleteI feel for ya, girl. It's a news story -you have every right to put it on your Facebook if you want!
ReplyDeleteI hate that cop for giving a ticket to that man! So wrong! It's no secret that people aren't fond of cops for that very reason. You weren't talking about any specific cop, after all. Glad you kept the video up!
Don't let it get you too down. Disagreements happen -it's part of life. In the mean time, curl up with your pup & eat some chocolate!
Oh sweetie! I feel for you on this one. I give you props for standing your ground and NOT deleting your video because you are right, it is YOUR facebook which means it is YOUR right to post YOUR opinion, and if others have a problem with it, well that's okay, we are all entitled to an opinion, they can post it on their page.
ReplyDeleteI hate that you and Mr. Wonderful had your first fight over this. Facebook definitely does cause so much drama, and sometimes it's just over nonsense. I'm sorry! I hope things smooth out soon for you guys! xoxoxo
I hate fb drama. Especially if it involves the in-laws. I once deleted my future sister in law from my friends list because she said some nasty things about me. Of course me deleting her caused even more drama. Ugh! We worked out our issues a few months later, but it made things awkward with his family for awhile.
ReplyDeleteDon't ever feel guilty for expressing your opinion girl! Your facebook page is your business.
I believe FB is SO OVERRATED and that people take it WAY TOO seriously.
ReplyDeleteI completely understand that you didnt mean to offend your boyfriends family as should they, but in the same sense I think it wouldve been way easier to delete the video. Life is about choosing your battles and a video on FB seems like such a ridiculous reason for you to be so upset. With that said the boy's fam needs to calm it down and by no way should they have attacked you. Thats just rude.
If I were youd I would apologize. NOT BECAUSE YOU ARE WRONG but because sometimes people apologize even when they are right if it for someone they LOVE. <<My mother taught me that as a child and it has gotten me far in life!!
Hope your day gets better! You are FAR too pretty to be crying Missy!!
Kristen
I'm sorry to hear this has caused such drama for you! I completely understand your point of view. It was a generalized statement and was definitely not directed at your significant other's family. In due time they will get over it and stop reacting out of emotion and overreacting and life will go on. People can just be so sensitive sometimes!! Good luck :)
ReplyDeleteFacebook breeds drama. I'm convinced there would be 99.999% less drama, if people werent stalking other peoples lives on facebook!
ReplyDeleteFor the record, I think it's putting cops in a bad light & asking for people to hate them as well.
You are so not alone in this. Facebook has become ridiculous. It's a source of drama for anyone that has one, myself included. I've hidden, unfriended, and ignored so many people just so I wouldn't say something I'd regret. It sucks that we can't even speak our mind anymore without reprimand!!!
ReplyDeleteSorry you had to go through all that BS, you don't deserve it!
Wow...I'm so sorry! : ( Makes me sad to know that you've had such a bad few days! I totally think that you have every right to post whatever you want on facebook. The wording of the title is obviously what got his family offended. I would just apologize and explain that you didn't mean it against them or rudely. You are totally right...society as a whole does dislike cops to some degree. I have several friends who are cops that I love, but I have had several bad experiences with cops, too. (Like when I accidentally set off my house alarm and they came busting in trying to arrest me for being in my own house...wouldn't believe that it was mine!)
ReplyDeleteAnyway, good luck to you. Just remember, you love your Mr and that means having to deal with his family, too.
I am totally with you! FACEBOOK SUCKS! All it does is cause drama! I totally understnad where you were coming from. I can't believe his family posted on it too! Cops know that all cops have bad reps, even the good cops! There are more serious issues than a guy speeding his wife to the hospital( who was probably CLEARLY in labor). I just find that ridiculous! I am sorry you had to go through that and I hope your day got better!
ReplyDeleteI've had this happen to me before. I've sad something without really thinking about it. And, like you, I wasn't really out of line, but it hurt other people's feelings and for that, I was wrong.
ReplyDeleteI would say that despite the fact that it is YOUR Facebook, it would probably save you a lot of hassle if you just were more careful about what you say on there.
It sucks how careful we ALL have to be these days about saying things on public forums like Facebook.
Drama is right! You had every right to post that video. I saw the video and thought the exact same thing. I have some family members who are cops, do I hate them? No. But that is a perfect example of why cops tend to get stereotyped. Hope the family drama isn't too bad. It's just the beginning, believe me!! :)
ReplyDeleteI hope you have a nice weekend to make up for the crappy day you endured. :(
ReplyDeletei can def see why they were offended, but you are entitled to your own opinion..and yeah, everyone (literally) i know HATES cops. usually its the nerdy guys that become cops and they are on some power trip. 90% of the ones i know are total asses.
ReplyDeletePerfect song for this. :) I think when you wrote "Situations like this are what give cops bad reps.." would explain the situation in a much lighter way to the family. If they are so wrapped up in this damn video (which is by the way, very true and I would totally post it)- maybe you can put on there (for the familiess sake and to keep your sanity).. "Allow me to rephrase- Situations like this in this video show why cops get bad reps- and why people end up hating cops. Not necessarily me." :) Good luck with that situation girl!
ReplyDeletehey, send me your email address
ReplyDeleteLOL! I saw you video link on facebook and saw what you wrote too. I didn't get a chance to comment on your fb page and now I wish I had because I TOTALLY agree with you! That story was bogus!!
ReplyDeleteOh my! I am so sorry that all of this is going on. I really hope that this weekend is a time that you can relax and get some of this stress to vanish! Hope things get better. I sure have missed you guys!
ReplyDeleteLady!! Hope you are feeling better!! I am so on your side! I totally agree with you, the cop is an ass for giving that guy a ticket. 6 minutes clearly shows it was an emergency. That is so shitty his family got invovled on fb. You are a great catch so dont think any less of yourself!! You are entitled to your own opinions and like you said, it had nothing to do with his family!! xoxo
ReplyDeleteI LOVE that you stood your ground with his family and with Mr Wonderful. You go girl!
ReplyDelete1. Just popped over from Kristen's blog and WTF your two roomatess basically KICKED YOU OUT because they didn't feel comfortable living with you???
ReplyDeleteand
2. Holy facebook drama. its CRAZY how uptight people get. I have had similar issues with family members and politics... NOT fun ;)
Hang in there girly.
Thank you all so much for commenting...I hated having to post such a debbie downer drama post, but actually I am glad I did...I got away from FB for a while 24 hours LOL then decided to go back today..although I have really got to get off sometimes because it can consume you!
ReplyDeleteHey there, catching up on your blog and I saw this post. I saw that video about the cop as well. What a jerk he was! It was clearly an emergency and could have put mother and baby in danger if he did not speed to get there.
ReplyDeleteFirst, I totally agree that FB is just FB and I hate when people make a big deal about it. I have my fiance's family members as friends so despite having a good relationship with them have had issues as well on FB.
Second, I have always been intimidated by cops. I'm not saying that all cops are jerks, but my experience with cops has not always been the best as well. My fiance is actually training to become a police officer which bothers me in of itself because of how dangerous it is, but I have told him so many times never to become on of those cops!
xoxo
Petchie
i hope you kept the video up. you can put whatever you want on FB and feel however you want about anything. if his family is throwing that big of a fit over it, they're probably going to get riled up over more ridiculous stuff in the future. hope your man stood up for you. but don't back down. you're allowed to have an opinion! i completely agree with you. : )
ReplyDeleteI feel for you girl. Good for you for standing your ground.
ReplyDeleteI don't agree with some commenters here that say that Facebook causes drama. People cause the drama, not Facebook. When people get offended over the tiniest things and dramatize them, that's what made the drama. There was NO reason you needed to take the video down either.
Also, if someone were in a life or death situation, speeding is excusable to me. It is the only time that I would put my family's well being at danger.
As Dr. Phil would say...do you want to be right or do you want to be happy?? My opinion, leave the video up, remove the "hate" line...put it as a "whaddy'all think about this?"
ReplyDeleteIts not worth making your man and his family upset.
Giving in a little will show you have a heart.
So, I'm wayyy late on this, but have to say, I agree with you and I am so sad you've had to deal with this. You're right, it is YOUR Facebook, and you have every right to express yourself! Some people are sooo hypersensitive and aggressive, always on the defense. Ugh, I swear, Facebook should be banned from anyone who was over the age of 30 when it came out. Older generations have no business being on it. And to be quite honest, I do hate cops. I have never - never ever - had a good experience with them, and sadly know a lot of people who have been unfairly singled out by cops who work in certain areas of Atlanta... Reverse discrimination and I'll leave it at that. Bottom line, I hope things have blown over and I do understand where you are coming from and why it hurt you! I'm always here if you need to chat! xoxo
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ReplyDeleteHow funny that you write a blog and preach the importance of freedom of speech. I notice you deleted two blog comments from last week? One of them were mine and in reading all your replies, it appears you simply only kept the ones from people who agreed with YOU! If your so insistent on hearing everyones views in regards to this pathetic posting, then leave ALL comments for people to see. Your obviously scared and can totally see why.
ReplyDeleteDear Anonymous- Grow some Effing balls. Seriously Who the FU*k cares about a post I wrote back in January? Only you do! No one has commented on it since the day it was written! I have/had the right to vent where ever I damn well please. I'm the one scared???? I'm not the one leaving "Anonymous" comments on someone's blog! You got something to say then don't leave mysterious comments. G E T A LIFE! It's pretty stalker ish to scroll all the way back through someone's blog up to FIVE MONTHS WORTH of posts! Seriously who does that? Oh right. YOU DO. Low life creep. Get over it. Everyone else has EXCEPT YOU.
ReplyDelete